First appointment and everyone's reactions to my new news..

by Kate 11. May 2015 00:03

The SECOND I received the phone number to Vincent's nurses' in Nephrology I called to set up the first available appointment. I didn't care what day or time, I was willing to take off work if I had to, I was determined to find out as soon as I humanely could. Although I didn't know if we truly were blood matches or not, I had this gut feeling that everything was going to be the way we wanted it to be.

I had felt like it was meant to be the first time I met Vincent. I can't explain why I felt this way but that's just how I am at times. I swore I was going to marry my fiance the first time I met him. And look where we are today. =] I had two wonderful nurses assist me in making an appointment and explaining some small details of what would be entailed. I scheduled an appointment less than two weeks out from the day I got the number. I was itching with anticipation and excitement.

Of course being so overwhelmed with excitement and joy I told my family and some friends. In return I figured everyone would be ecstatic and too happy for me even though we were just into round one of tests. Well I'll tell you it wasn't exactly what I was expecting from them. I didn't not have their support but I surely didn't get as much excitement out of them. I can understand why. There are risks (as there are for ANY surgery) and I'm their child, grandchild, coworker, friend, etc. No one wants to see a family member be put into a situation where there are risks of negative outcomes.

I never understood this side of the table until I met with my WONDERFUL surgeon, Dr. Tiao. He was great. He was so thorough and answered any questions we had. (I found and rated him on Cincinnati.MD ! You can check out my ratings and reviews on him. Search Tiao in Cincinnati, first name Gregory.) He told me during his explanatory speech that surgeons see children like Vincent whom are sick. As a human being and a surgeon they want to fix what is considered "wrong". When donors who are generally healthy (because you medically HAVE to be to donate) come in their human instinct is to let this person be. Not touch or cause a risk of harm to this healthy person. It's not normal to go out of their way to change a person's life not because they need the change but because they are consenting and WANT that change to help someone else.

I never really put this into perspective. Dr. Tiao and his group of surgeons are there to be sure there is no more harm done to my body, besides what is obviously necessary. And even though I have given my consent for this surgery, there is a little voice in their head asking, is this considered ethical? Obviously, it is, I'm giving my consent to give an organ to help another human. Because I never once saw it that way, I saw it as I'm putting myself at risk for things because I want to give another person a chance at life.

I'm PROUD to be donating my kidney to Vincent. This is a blog to show my experience, doubts, concerns, questions, etc. I hope that maybe someone, even if it's just ONE person, finds this to be inspiring and ends up donating, I would say all of this was worth it. I'm not doing this for any fame, money, fortune or to impress someone. I'm doing this because this is something I WANT to do. This is something I'm so PROUD to be doing. I think I'm gaining just as much as Vincent. He's receiving a physical token while mine isn't something you can hold or buy. It's the humbling feeling I get and the joy I get knowing I gave a child a chance he didn't have without a kidney.

Comments (1) -

Tami
Tami
5/11/2015 7:21:50 AM #

Kate, I am sure as the surgery date draws closer, your mind is working overtime. Just remember that you are a "True Hero" and what you are doing for Vincent and his family is a gift (of life). Not many people would even consider doing what you are doing. You will and are always in my prayers. Thank you for trying to tell your story to inspire more people to do what you are! We love you and are as proud of you as if you were one of our own!

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